Jinx!

Yeah, I jinxed it again. I said that I was feeling better, and now I'm crashing again. Seriously, this little dance is getting old.

The Lyme cycle means that when the bacteria try to reproduce and get killed, I experience the die-off reaction (herx) and feel like crap. Then the herx fades and I start to feel better. And in the case of the last two jinxes, I think I'm making continued improvement due to the Rocephin. And so I start to think, "Hey, this is great! I'm feeling better! Woo hoo!" And then I write about it because I'm at the top of the roller coaster and everything looks wonderful...and then I crest the hill and the herx hits me and whoosh I'm falling back down.

The goal is to make the good times better and the bad times less severe and/or prolonged. I still think that's happening. However, that doesn't mean that the bad times are any fun.

Over the past week, I've seen my cognitive function decline. I can't concentrate as well, and I have started making more speech and writing mistakes. (I just typed "speach" and had to correct it.) I forget things more easily. Sometimes I forget to take a round of medication, which is not good.

The body pain is also increased. The new methadone prescription isn't keeping up with it right now. My hips ache to the point that standing, sitting, and lying down are all painful. Walking hurts. My back hurts. My fingers hurt.

And I'm tired. I'd finally gotten used to getting up early-ish, but now I'm back to sleeping 12 - 14 hours a night. Which isn't any fun, because I keep waking up due to the pain.

But I know that this is temporary. It's clearly a herx, and I've just got to take care of myself and allow my body the space and time it needs to get through this. I've got extra energetic support in place. I'm getting a massage tomorrow. And I'm spending extra time in my jammies, resting and cuddling the cats. It's all a part of healing.